Lonely boy who Loves you

The door opened slowly, leaving a stream of bright light from the hallway across the floor of room 3.
The light also revealed a tired-looking John in the door, leaning against the doorframe. His red eyes and still wet cheeks made it obvious he had been crying, and very recently as well.
He didn't want to talk to anyone. Not a single person. Just Cinderella. He had made sure he had come when her roommate was asleep. But he needed her now, more than anyone. More than ever before.

Cinderella woke up when the light hit her face. "Hmm, what...?" She said, blinking her eyes open. Last thing she remembered was talking to Lilo...

She looked up to see John leaning on the door frame. "John?" She asked, sitting up. She noticed a blonde woman sleeping in the room and realized it was best to be quiet.

It was when she looked at John a second time that she could see the stat he was in. Her face turned into one of worry. "John..." She whispered, standing up and going to him. She gently took his face in her hands, studying his face.

He couldn't help but let a few more tears run down his cheeks as she took his head in her hands.
"Cindy.." he tried to say, but his voice was broken.
He had no one. Absolutely no one in this whole wide world. He would never dream of asking for forgiveness or understanding, and yet Cinderella had talked about him so kindly to Lilo. Even after all he did... she was still there...
Not only the sadness, but also the overwhelming emotion of what he felt as he thought about that made the tears run down his face.

Cinderella smiled softly at him as she wiped his tears away. "Shhh, it's okay." She said, before hugging him. "I'm here." She said, softly.

She didn't like seeing him breaking...

He hugged her back, so tight he was afraid she might break, before he loosened the grip. He was still hugging her however.
Why had he ever left her? She felt so nice in his arms. She was sokind, and sweet and... everything he had wanted. She was the exception to his rule that humans were evil. She was the only pure, honestly good human he'd ever seen, and she loved him. WHAT WAS WRONG WITH HIM?!
"I love you.." he whispered, as he couldn't talk.

Cinderella was surprised to hear those words from him again. They made her heart ache, ache in the realization at how much she truly missed those words from him. She moved her head a little and kissed his cheek.

"I love you too, John.That still hasn't changed, not one bit." She said, feeling the tears start to form in her eyes. She placed her head on his shoulder as she hugged him.

He pulled away from her, only to lean back in and kiss her. Softly at first, as if carefully and hesitantly, he was still unsure if she wanted him or not. He was in no way expecting any type of forgiveness. Not after all he had done to her.

She kissed him back, slowly and gently, feeling that her lips really missed his. She pulled back a little. "I missed you..." She whispered, softly against his lips.

He had missed her too. So much he could not even begin to tell her how much.
Without even bothering to close the door, he gently pushed Cinderella further into the room until they hit the wall, and started kissing her passionatly and deeply, letting his tounge play with hers.
Meanwhile he put his hands behind her back pulling her as close as she could possibly get. He wanted to feel her whole body against his. Finally.

ooc:

She let out a gasp when her back hit a wall. Her hands went up to his hair, pulling him closer. Her hands moved around, from his hair, to his arms, shoulders, back, face. She let out a tiny soft moan in the kiss, showing how much she enjoyed it and how much she missed his kiss and touch.

He let his hand wander from her back and down to her ass, grabbing it softly, pulling her pelvis towards his.
He kissed her deeply, but quickly pulled away from her and took his hands off of her as he realized what he was doing.
He couldn't do this to her. Not again.
He was breathing heavily, and his eyes were wild with passion, but wide in shock and regret. She didn't deserve this, he just couldn't. Not again.

She couldn't help but let out a little giggle when he grabbed her butt. When he pulled away from her suddenly, she fell back against the wall. She was grateful that she had not been too far away from the wall when she fell back.

She watched him, as she was breathing heavily. She stood up from the wall, seeing is reaction. "John..." She said, softly, holding her hand out to him. She offered him a smile, hoping he would understand that she understood his reaction.

He closed his eyes violently, as hard as he could, trying to shut it all out.
When she reached out for him he quickly stepped back, avoiding her touch, before he turned his back on her about to leave the room again. Why had he even come?!
You idiot...

Cinderella rushed to grab his hand. "Please... don't go..." She pleaded, softly, moving her other hand to his shoulder, her head moving to his shoulder.

If he left this way... he would regret it more then coming.

"We can talk?" She suggested, softly.

He turned to her again, new tears forming in his eyes.
He was such a mess, how had he allowed himself to get like this? Only months earlier he would never have let anyone see him cry, but now... he just didn't know anymore.
"Cindy, I... I..." he stuttered with a broken voice, not knowing what to say. What could he possibly say to her? He had already said too much by telling her he loved her again. It would only hurt her more in the long run.

She raised her hand to his cheek again. She smiled softly at him. "Would you like to feel your baby kick?" She asked, moving the hand she was holding to her stomach.

The baby kicked inside of her.

Feeling the baby filled him with mixed emotions. But most of all, guilt and regret. How could he have possibly done this to her? He would have to give it away as soon as it was born. There was no other option. However, he decided not to tell her that. It would only upset her a lot more than necessary.
He couldn't deny that his heart was warmed a little by thinking about the baby, but he was not a father. He would never be a father. He would feel horribly sorry for whoever had to grow up with a father anything like him.
The child was better off with anyone else as a parent.
He could not face Cinderella with thoughts like this however, so he simply kept looking down and held his hand on her stomach.

Cinderella smiled at him, wondering what he was thinking. She reached up and kissed him on the cheek.

"I can't do this Cindy.." he said softly. He felt sorry for her, he really did, but he just couldn't do this. She deserved better, so much better. She must realize that herself, right? She couldn't honestly think the best thing for her was to stay with him?
"I'm sorry..."

She placed her hand on his cheek again and smiled softly. "I know..." She said, her smile a little sad.

"I won't ask you to, either... you can't force someone to stay with someone... right?" She said, with a little shrug.

"I'm here when you need me though, okay?" She said, reminding him that she was always ready to listen. "Talk to me whenever you want." She said, before kissing his cheek again.

At her first words he could do nothing but let more tears run down his cheek. He wanted her so badly, didn't she understand? It pained him more than it could ever hurt her to make himself let go of her.
As she told him how she would still be there for him he could not take it anymore.
"Don't give me that option Cindy... don't do that to yourself..." he said pleadingly, not really knowing if he wanted to keep her from hurting herself, or hurting him.

"Why not?" She asked, softly. "I'm not going to deny that I would love nothing more then to be with you, John. If I can't be with you... I need you to know that I won't turn you away if you need help... You mean a lot to me. I'm not lying when I say I love you, even if you have done horrible things, or forced me and others to kill someone to stay alive... If my feelings haven't changed yet, they never will."

He pushed her against the wall, leaving one hand on each side of her head to keep her there, close to him.
"I'm dangerous, don't you get that?!" he close to yelled at her.
"It's one thing to love me, but why on earth would you want me?! How can you not realize that you'd be happier with someone else?! WHY CAN'T YOU JUST STOP BEING SO GOD DAMN NICE TO ME?! I DON'T DESERVE IT!" he screamed at the end.
He just wanted her to realize. And he wanted her to leave him, before she hurt herself, and him, even more than they were already hurting.
Though he was yelling, he could not help crying again, and he cursed himself for being so weak in front of her.

ooc: D'AAAAWWWWWWWWWW! STOP MAKING ME PITY THE VILLAIN UGHHH!

"I do get that." She said, doing her best to keep her voice level. "Do you really see me ending up with someone else? Do you really see me having a future outside of here? Only other guy who I have really gotten close to here is, surprisingly, Sinbad. He loves all women though. I get that I'm in love with the man who kidnapped me, who has murdered and tortured people. I get that, okay? That doesn't mean my feelings can change at a drop of a hat or my thoughts and dreams about possibly having a wonderful life with you." She stated, doing her best not to yell, but she was sure that her roommate may wake up to his shouting.

"Everyone deserves kindness, John. No matter who they are or what they've done, everyone deserves to have someone be kind to them, even if it's just once in their life."

He lowered his voice, realizing shouting would never make her understand.
"Think of everything I've put you through. Every heartbreak, every goodbye, every torture..." he said, trying desperatly not to break down as he remember them as well.
"Do you honestly think all of that is worth it for one lousy kiss once in a while?" he asked softly, looking her in the eyes.

"It shouldn't be." She stated. "I'm not going to push you away, though. I really can't. I can give up the thought of being with you, but I'm not going to push you away when you need someone." She said, her eyes holding determination and truth.

"Why not?" he asked while looking into her eyes.
"And do not give me the same selfless crap you always give me. What do you want? For you?"

"You." The word slipped out before she could think. "I want to have a happy life with you. I want to marry you and for us to raise our child together and be a happy family." She stated, her gaze not moving from his.

"But I've learned we can't always get what we want... We can only do the best with what we get..." She said, softly, remembering the times she wanted something and always being forced in the direction of what she didn't want.

That was it. He lost it. He couldn't take this anymore, and if she was going to be this stupid then so be it. He was done trying to convince her.
He pulled her close to him, kissing her passionatly once again, feeling the warmth in his chest as his arms wrapped around her.
"You're such an idiot," he said softly. He meant the words, but in a loving way.

When he pulled her close to him and kissed her, her heart fluttered and her body immediately filled with warmth. She wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him back just as passionately.
"I think I can live with that." She said, softly, smiling up at him.

She could live with that? He wasn't so sure, but for now he didn't care.
He kissed her softly once again, and brushed her cheek gently.
"I should probably go before your roommate wakes up.." he said softly, while holding her chin in his hand and nodding over to her sleeping roommate.

Her eyes closed in happiness at his kiss.

"Hmm?" She asked, opening her eyes. "Oh, right." She said, softly, glancing at her roommate.

She had forgotten about her.

She kissed his lips once more, wanting to feel them on hers at least one more time.

"Don't worry," he said with a crooked, sly smile.
"You will see me at the christmas party," he winked, before slowly letting go of her hand and walking to the open door.
He hadn't told anyone about the christmas party yet, and it was supposed to be a secret, though he couldn't see the harm in telling Cinderella. It would only bring her a little happiness and something to look forward to.

Christmas Party?

Cinderella smiled brightly at the thought. She walked back up to him and kissed him on the cheek. "I love you." She whispered in his ear, smiling. "I'll see you then."

He brushed her cheek with the back of his hand and smiled bitterly. Why did their happiness have to be so short and bitter?
"I love you too," he said in a soft whisper, letting go of her and closing the door behind her before locking it.
You have no idea how much I mean those words...

OOC: D'awww. :3 Okay, I'm Team John now. Sorry Team Sinbad. I was just so Meg/John that I forgot how much I liked Cindy/John!

[OOC: I HAVE A TEAM?! O.O ... Wait, my team is winning right? <.<]

[OOC: Yep, your team is winning John You have a fleet of fangirls too. ^.^]

OOC: The Meg that is still in me feels sad and forgotten for how many times John told to Cindy that he loves her >.>
The jul that's in me… luckily was sleeping XD
The me that's in me (XD) loves Cindy (but still feel sad for Meg X3)